Looking for a plant-based patty that doesn’t taste like cardboard?
The vegan burger world is a wild frontier of delicious innovations and spectacular failures.
Some meatless options will blow your mind with flavor while others might make you question why you gave up beef in the first place. Let’s separate the mouth-watering from the just plain awful!
1. Beyond Burger: The Meat-Lover’s Miracle
Holy cow—or should I say holy plants? Beyond Burger sizzles, bleeds, and tastes so eerily similar to beef that your carnivore friends might do a double-take.
What if I told you this revolutionary patty gets its meaty magic from pea protein and beets? Grill one up and watch jaws drop when you reveal no animals were harmed in the making of this burger.
2. Impossible Burger: Science In A Bun
Though initially skeptical about a burger containing something called heme, my taste buds surrendered at first bite! Impossible Burger’s genius lies in its laboratory-perfected formula that replicates beef’s umami goodness.
Seriously mind-blowing stuff happens when this patty hits a hot grill. Carnivores and herbivores unite under the banner of this science experiment gone deliciously right!
3. Field Roast Burger: Grain Game Strong
If you’re seeking texture that doesn’t pretend to be meat, Field Roast brings hearty grain goodness to the plant-based party! These robust patties celebrate their veggie identity rather than masquerading as something else.
Packed with barley, carrots, and celery, these burgers offer a delightful chew that stands up to aggressive toppings. Ever tasted something that embraces its plant-based nature so confidently?
4. Dr. Praeger’s California Veggie Burger: Garden Party
Veggie chunks you can actually identify? Dr. Praeger’s celebrates transparency with colorful bits of carrots, peas, and corn dancing throughout each patty.
Where most vegan options try hiding their vegetable origins, these vibrant burgers proudly showcase their garden-fresh ingredients. Though somewhat crumbly, they compensate with a fresh flavor profile that tastes like summer in sandwich form!
5. Gardein Ultimate Plant-Based Burger: Backyard BBQ Champion
Flame-grilled nostalgia comes through with every bite of Gardein’s Ultimate creation! Their genius lies in capturing that quintessential backyard cookout flavor without animal products.
Hence, even die-hard meat enthusiasts might be fooled by its smoky profile and substantial texture. Whereas some vegan options fall apart during cooking, this sturdy patty holds its shape beautifully from freezer to plate.
6. Sweet Earth Awesome Burger: Protein Powerhouse
Gym rats, rejoice! Sweet Earth’s Awesome Burger packs a whopping 26 grams of protein, making it the heavyweight champion of plant-based nutrition.
How does it manage such impressive stats? Through a clever blend of pea and wheat proteins that create both satisfying chew and muscle-building benefits. Bodybuilders skeptical about going vegan should give this protein-packed disc a chance to change their minds!
7. Trader Joe’s Protein Patties: Budget-Friendly Brilliance
Wallet feeling light? Trader Joe’s swoops in with affordable plant-based patties that don’t sacrifice flavor for frugality! These ruby-hued discs deliver surprising depth despite their humble price tag.
Though slightly smaller than competitors, they compensate with rich umami notes and convincing texture. Furthermore, they cook up quickly, making them perfect for those hangry moments when patience runs thin.
8. Hilary’s World’s Best Veggie Burger: Allergy-Friendly Hero
Allergic to everything under the sun? Hilary’s has your back with these miraculous patties free from 12 common allergens! Made primarily from millet and sweet potatoes, they’re a godsend for the dietary-restricted crowd.
Though smaller and thinner than most competitors, they deliver surprisingly satisfying flavor. Imagine finding a vegan burger that doesn’t trigger hives, digestive distress, or anaphylaxis—now that’s something to celebrate!
9. MorningStar Farms Incogmeato: Identity Crisis Central
Despite the clever name, there’s nothing incognito about this burger’s artificial taste! MorningStar’s attempt at meat replication falls flatter than a pancake run over by a steamroller.
Ever bitten into something that tastes simultaneously like nothing and everything wrong? The texture resembles wet cardboard that’s been briefly introduced to a spice cabinet. Sadly, this patty belongs in the compost bin rather than on your plate.
10. Boca Original Vegan Burger: Blast From The Bland Past
Ah, Boca—the dinosaur of vegan burgers that refuses to evolve! While revolutionary in 1979, these hockey pucks of sadness haven’t updated their formula since bell-bottoms were cool.
Lacking moisture, flavor, and basic appeal, they represent everything people fear about vegan food. Why do they taste simultaneously dry and mushy? A true mystery of culinary science that nobody should have to solve with their taste buds.
11. Amy’s California Veggie Burger: Mushy Disappointment
Structural integrity? Never heard of her! Amy’s veggie patties disintegrate faster than your willpower at a donut shop.
Though packed with recognizable vegetables, these patties transform into sad, soggy piles upon cooking. Can something be simultaneously dry and mushy? Apparently yes! The flavor isn’t offensive, but the texture makes eating one feel like chewing wet newspaper.
12. Lightlife Plant-Based Burger: Artificial Aftertaste Avalanche
Beware the chemical carnival that is Lightlife’s attempt at plant-based burgers! One bite unleashes a wave of artificial flavors that linger like an unwelcome houseguest.
Though the texture initially impresses, the bizarre aftertaste quickly destroys any goodwill. Imagine licking a laboratory floor after a science experiment gone wrong. Don’t waste your hard-earned cash on this scientific mishap disguised as food!
13. 365 Plant-Based Burger: Whole Foods, Half Effort
Whole Foods might excel at emptying your wallet, but their house-brand vegan burger proves that premium prices don’t guarantee premium taste! These bland discs lack personality, flavor, and basic appeal.
Where’s the excitement? The innovation? The reason to buy another package? Missing in action, apparently. Shockingly boring for a store known for culinary excellence, these patties are the beige paint of the burger world.
14. Quorn Meatless Gourmet Burger: Fungus Fiasco
Mycoprotein might sound scientifically impressive, but Quorn’s fungus-based burgers taste like they were harvested from the wrong part of the forest floor! The strange, spongy texture defies logical comparison.
Is it meat? Is it bread? Is it something alien entirely? Your taste buds will be too confused to decide. Moreover, some people report digestive distress after consuming these mysterious discs—hardly a ringing endorsement!
15. Don Lee Farms Organic Plant-Based Burger: Costco Catastrophe
Bulk shopping enthusiasts beware! Don Lee Farms’ vegan patties might come in an economical family pack, but quantity cannot compensate for their spectacular lack of quality.
Oddly sweet and inexplicably mushy, these burgers taste like someone accidentally mixed dessert ingredients into the vegetable bin. How did they achieve such an unpleasant texture? Through what appears to be culinary alchemy gone terribly wrong.
16. Alpha Foods Original Beefy Plant-Based Burger: Bland Betrayal
Nothing about Alpha Foods’ burger deserves the “alpha” designation! These underwhelming patties rank firmly in the beta category of vegan options, with their primary flavor being disappointment.
Though the packaging promises beefiness, the reality delivers cardboard with vague seasoning. Want to experience the culinary equivalent of a shrug? Spend your money on these forgettable discs and prepare for the definition of mediocrity.