Ever wondered which LongHorn Steakhouse menu items might sabotage your diet? While this popular steakhouse offers plenty of tasty options, some pack a serious calorie punch that might make your doctor cringe.
I’ve rounded up the worst offenders that combine mouthwatering flavors with eye-popping nutrition numbers – perfect information for your next visit, whether you decide to indulge or steer clear.
1. Texas Tonion
Holy calorie bomb! This deep-fried monstrosity transforms a humble onion into a mountain of crispy, golden-brown disaster. Sliced, battered, and fried until impossibly crunchy, the Texas Tonion comes paired with a creamy dipping sauce that only amplifies its nutritional damage.
What makes this appetizer so dangerous? Besides the obvious oil-soaked breading, that innocent-looking dip contains mayo, sour cream, and a blend of high-fat seasonings. One order delivers nearly a day’s worth of calories.
2. Parmesan-Crusted Chicken
Chicken breast sounds healthy until LongHorn gets involved! This seemingly innocent poultry dish gets smothered in a thick layer of parmesan cheese crust that soaks up butter like a sponge at a pool party. The crispy, golden exterior hides a caloric nightmare underneath.
Each bite delivers a one-two punch of saturated fat from both the cheese and the butter-based sauce pooled underneath. Add the creamy garlic topping, and you’ve got yourself a heart attack on a plate masquerading as “just chicken.”
3. White Cheddar Stuffed Mushrooms
Size doesn’t matter when it comes to these deceptive little devils! Each innocent-looking mushroom cap comes loaded with a mixture of four cheeses, garlic butter, and breadcrumbs that’ll make your arteries beg for mercy. The problem isn’t just one mushroom – it’s the fact that nobody stops at just one.
Bite-sized foods trick your brain into thinking you’re not eating much. Meanwhile, each mushroom delivers a concentrated dose of saturated fat that would make a cardiologist weep. The white cheddar forms a gooey, stretchy web that’s irresistibly delicious and devastatingly caloric.
4. LH Burger
Forget fast food burgers – this beast makes them look like diet food! The LH Burger combines a thick, juicy beef patty with melted cheese, bacon, and a variety of toppings that send its calorie count into the stratosphere. One bite requires unhinging your jaw like a python swallowing prey.
The beef alone packs enough fat to make your cardiologist nervously update their emergency contact info. Then comes the cheese – not a dainty slice, but a thick blanket that oozes down the sides like lava from a fat-filled volcano. Let’s not forget the mayo-based sauce that adds hundreds of sneaky calories.
5. Half-Pound Steakhouse Cheeseburger
Weighing in at a belt-busting half-pound, this monster burger doesn’t just break calorie records – it shatters them! Eight ounces of premium beef gets topped with enough cheese to supply a small pizza joint. The bun alone could count as a meal for some people.
Nutrition experts recommend 3-4 ounces of protein per serving. This burger laughs at such recommendations while delivering more saturated fat than you should consume in an entire day. The worst part? Most diners polish off every last bite, blissfully unaware they’ve just consumed calories equivalent to three proper meals.
6. Crispy Buttermilk Chicken Sandwich
Don’t let the word “chicken” fool you – there’s nothing lean about this sandwich! A massive chicken breast gets soaked in buttermilk, coated in seasoned flour, and deep-fried until the exterior resembles golden armor. The oil absorption alone adds hundreds of calories before toppings even enter the picture.
Between the mayo-based sauce and the buttered, toasted bun, you’re looking at a fat bomb that rivals any beef option on the menu. The crispy coating might deliver satisfying crunch, but it also traps oil like a sponge, creating a calorie-dense exterior that would make even fast food chains blush.
7. LongHorn Porterhouse (22 oz)
Good grief – 22 ounces of beef on one plate! This colossal cut combines both a tender filet and a flavorful strip steak into one massive meat monument that would make a T-Rex salivate. The sheer volume of animal protein defies reasonable portion recommendations by about 500%.
Each bite delivers a freight train of saturated fat directly to your arteries. The real kicker? Most folks add a loaded baked potato swimming in sour cream and butter, effectively doubling down on dietary destruction.
8. Baby Back Ribs (Full-Rack)
Caution: consuming this full rack requires signing a waiver for your cardiovascular system! These fall-off-the-bone ribs arrive completely smothered in sweet, sticky barbecue sauce that contains more sugar than three candy bars.
A single rack contains multiple servings of meat, yet most customers proudly clean their plates solo. The collagen and fat that make ribs so tender also make them a nutritional disaster zone. That signature barbecue sauce adds hundreds of empty calories through its high sugar content.
9. Outlaw Ribeye (20 oz)
Twenty ounces of highly marbled beef should be shared between a family of four, not conquered by a single diner! This massive ribeye flaunts its extensive fat content like a badge of honor – those white streaks running through the meat aren’t just flavor, they’re pure saturated fat waiting to clog an artery.
The ribeye cut is specifically selected for its high fat-to-meat ratio, making it one of the most calorie-dense proteins available. LongHorn doesn’t stop there – they add seasoned butter that melts into a puddle of additional calories. The steak’s size exceeds reasonable portion guidelines by roughly 500%.
10. Chocolate Stampede
Brace yourself for the nutritional equivalent of a nuclear explosion! This dessert should come with a warning label and emergency contact form. Six types of chocolate combine in unholy matrimony: two chocolate cakes, two chocolate mousse layers, chocolate fudge frosting, and chocolate shavings – all served with not one but TWO scoops of vanilla ice cream.
A single serving contains more sugar than you should consume in three days. The calorie count? Higher than some people’s entire daily intake. The fat content comes primarily from heavy cream, butter, and chocolate – a trio of saturated fat superstars.