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I Ate Poutine At 15 Chains—Regret Was Real

I Ate Poutine At 15 Chains—Regret Was Real

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Poutine sounds simple—fries, curds, and gravy—but getting it right takes more than dumping ingredients into a box. Some fast food chains manage real comfort in a cup, while others serve up lukewarm gravy on limp fries and call it a day.

This list isn’t here to sugarcoat. After tasting 15 versions from different chains, the truth is clear: a lot of them need to try again.

1. KFC

KFC
© Reddit

The fries come seasoned, but the seasoning vanishes under a tsunami of salty, sludgy gravy. Cheese curds? Good luck finding them.

The whole thing turns into a soggy mess within minutes. It feels like someone poured soup over a microwave dinner and called it comfort.

2. Burger King

Burger King
© Reddit

The fries alone taste like regret, and layering them with bland, gluey gravy only makes things worse. The curds are nearly melted away.

Texture is nonexistent, and so is flavor depth. This version feels rushed, unloved, and totally unworthy of its Canadian roots.

3. A&W

A&W
© Reddit

The curds squeak, but not in a good way. The fries, usually decent, are drowned by gravy that tastes oddly metallic.

There is effort, but something feels off. It lands in the uncanny valley of fast food—almost satisfying, yet oddly unpleasant.

4. Wendy’s

Wendy’s
© Delishably

Crinkle fries soak up gravy like a sponge, leaving no crispness behind. The whole bowl turns into a heavy, bland heap.

The cheese melts too fast, so all you get is starchy mush topped with brown goo. It barely counts as poutine.

5. McDonald’s

McDonald’s
© Reddit

There is nostalgia here, but the fries aren’t built for this job. Gravy seeps through too fast, ruining every bite.

Curds are scarce and tasteless. It resembles a sad cafeteria experiment, better left off the menu.

6. Popeyes

Popeyes
© Reddit

They know spice, not poutine. Their fries are bold, but the curds are out of place and the gravy tastes like a side note.

It feels like three ingredients that never had a conversation. Disjointed, confusing, and ultimately forgettable.

7. Dairy Queen

Dairy Queen
© Reddit

The fries have zero structure. The gravy is too peppery, too thick, and overwhelms the mild curds.

It doesn’t help that it all arrives lukewarm. The final bite is just as disappointing as the first.

8. Harvey’s

Harvey’s
© harveys

There’s promise here, but something always goes wrong—either the curds clump or the gravy floods the box.

Each bite gives hope, then yanks it away. It’s a rollercoaster of frustration and soggy disappointment.

9. Arby’s

Arby’s
© Reddit

Curly fries are the wrong base. They fight the gravy and confuse the dish’s texture completely.

This tastes more like a weird nacho experiment than poutine. It tries to be clever and ends up chaotic.

10. New York Fries

New York Fries
© Reddit

The only one that seems to understand poutine’s soul. The fries are thick and the curds have life.

Gravy here is rich without being overwhelming. It’s not perfect, but it knows what it wants to be.

11. Tim Hortons

Tim Hortons
© Daily Hive

A coffee shop should not attempt poutine. The fries feel like leftovers and the gravy is eerily sweet.

Curds are rubbery at best. It comes off as a reluctant afterthought, like someone dared them to make it.

12. Five Guys

Five Guys
© Reddit

Fresh-cut fries work well alone, but the poutine version feels unfinished. The gravy tastes like watered-down broth.

Cheese doesn’t stand a chance in this flood. It ends up as wet fries with a price tag.

13. Carl’s Jr.

Carl’s Jr.
© Foodbeast

There’s a smoky hint in the gravy that distracts more than it adds. Fries are limp and overcooked.

It tries to be gourmet, but falls flat. Texture, balance, and flavor all miss the mark.

14. Shake Shack

Shake Shack
© www.cheesecurdsburgers.com

They go for upscale, but the elegance gets lost. The curds are tiny and the gravy has no backbone.

This feels like a half-hearted tribute dressed in fancy packaging. All shine, no soul.

15. Checkers/Rally’s

Checkers/Rally’s
© Reddit

Seasoned fries have punch, but the rest crashes hard. The cheese is plasticky and the gravy feels artificial.

It overwhelms fast and leaves a strange aftertaste. A reminder that not every twist needs to exist.