Frozen pizza is one of life’s great shortcuts. You toss it in the oven, go fold some laundry (or not), and twenty minutes later—boom—dinner. But let’s be real: not all frozen pizzas are created equal. Some are reliable standbys that get the job done.
Others barely count as pizza and leave you questioning your life choices. This list ranks 10 frozen pizzas that land somewhere in the middle—not awful, not amazing—plus 5 truly tragic ones that should probably stay buried in the back of the freezer.
If you’ve ever bitten into a sad, rubbery crust or a suspicious “cheese blend,” this one’s for you.
1. Tony’s Pepperoni Pizza
Tony’s has been around forever, and you can tell. The crust is thin and soft in a way that leans more microwaved pancake than pizza base, and the pepperoni adds just enough spice to pretend you’re having a real slice.
It’s not disgusting—but it’s not something you’d serve proudly to anyone you like. Think of it as emergency pizza for when you’ve lost the will to cook and your standards have left the building.
2. California Pizza Kitchen White Pizza
This pie tries to be fancy with a creamy white sauce, spinach, and cheeses, but it misses the mark. The crust is delicate yet bland, and the toppings don’t offer much contrast or punch.
If you want something light and pizza-adjacent, it’s fine. But if you’re craving flavor or indulgence, this one leaves you cold.
3. Red Baron Thin & Crispy Pepperoni
This crust lives up to its name—it definitely crunches. But beyond that, you’re dealing with a flat layer of oily cheese, minimal sauce, and pepperoni slices that vanish into the background.
It’s not offensive, just underwhelming. Red Baron fans might still grab it for nostalgia, but it won’t impress anyone new.
4. Totino’s Party Pizza (Cheese)
It’s a rectangle of childhood chaos. The crust is cardboard-thin, the sauce is suspiciously sweet, and the cheese feels like a plastic experiment that somehow got FDA approval.
And yet… it works in certain scenarios. It’s fast, it’s cheap, and when you’re desperate or hungover, it tastes like regret and comfort at the same time.
5. Amy’s Cheese Pizza
This organic offering aims to please the healthy-eating crowd, but it plays things way too safe. The sauce has a hint of garden freshness, but the cheese barely melts and the crust is stiff without being crispy.
It’s fine if you’re looking for light and meatless. Just don’t expect big pizza energy from this mellow pie.
6. DiGiorno Thin Crust Supreme
DiGiorno’s known for its rising crusts, but their thin crust line is hit or miss. This one piles on peppers and sausage, but somehow the flavors all blur together in a way that lacks personality.
The crust bakes fast and crisp, but you’ll be left wishing the toppings had a little more soul.
7. Tombstone 5 Cheese
Five cheeses sound exciting, but none of them really stand out. The pizza leans heavy on salt, and the flavor feels like a melted blur rather than a creamy masterpiece.
You’ll eat it and be full, sure. But the experience is more “cheesy blanket” than “cheese celebration.”
8. Whole Foods 365 Pepperoni
It’s clean, it’s minimally processed, and it has decent sauce. But everything feels a bit too… restrained. Like it’s trying hard not to offend.
The crust doesn’t crisp up well, and the pepperoni is there more for decoration than flavor. It’s polite pizza—not party pizza.
9. Great Value Rising Crust
Walmart’s house brand delivers a huge, puffy crust that takes over the entire experience. The toppings are sparse, and the sauce is aggressively sweet.
This one fills you up, but it doesn’t scratch the pizza itch. If anything, it tastes more like pepperoni bread than an actual pizza.
10. Celeste Pizza For One
Microwavable and oddly charming, Celeste’s single-serve pizzas are pure 1990s nostalgia. But the crust turns soggy fast, and the sauce practically swims around the cheese.
It’s more like a saucy snack than a full-on meal. Good for a guilty bite between real meals—but that’s about it.
11. Banquet Deep Dish Pizza
Deep dish sounds promising—until you try this one. The crust is rubbery, the cheese congeals before your eyes, and the sauce tastes like salty ketchup.
This sad little pie feels like a science experiment gone wrong. There are better ways to ruin your night than eating this.
12. Market Pantry (Target) Cheese Pizza
You’d think Target would have their frozen pizza act together. Nope. This one feels like a flatbread covered in tomato-flavored paste and cheese-like dust.
It bakes up unevenly and tastes like freezer burn mixed with indifference. You deserve better—even on a tight budget.
13. Mama Cozzi’s Cauliflower Crust
Aldi shoppers might defend this one, but let’s be honest—it’s rough. The crust falls apart, the toppings barely stick, and the aftertaste screams “frozen vegetable purge.”
If you’re going gluten-free, there are better cauliflower crusts on the market. This one just feels like punishment.
14. Lean Cuisine Pepperoni Pizza
It tries to be low-calorie and still deliver pizza joy—but fails at both. The crust is dry and mealy, the pepperoni is wispy, and the whole thing feels like it’s missing love (and salt).
This isn’t pizza. It’s a cry for help with melted cheese on top.
15. Michelina’s Pizza Snack Rolls
They look fun in the box. But once heated, these rolls become lava-hot pods of disappointment, oozing a weirdly sweet filling that tastes nothing like actual pizza.
The texture is gummy, the flavor fake, and the aftertaste lingers far too long. Just microwave some actual pizza instead.