Panera has earned a loyal following with its comforting soups, fresh breads, and wholesome salads. But not every item on the menu deserves a spot on your tray.
Over countless family lunches and takeout nights, a dozen dishes have sparked more disappointment than delight around our table. Here are 12 Panera orders we simply won’t touch anymore—and you might think twice about them too.
1. Broccoli Cheddar Mac & Cheese
Comfort food mashups sound genius until you actually try them. Panera’s attempt to marry their iconic soup with creamy mac creates a strange textural battlefield in your mouth – soggy broccoli bits floating in a sea of too-rich cheese sauce.
The sodium bomb effect is real too – we all end up chugging water for hours afterward. Strange how something containing two beloved foods can become less than the sum of its parts!
2. Flatbread Pizzas
Pizza purists beware! Panera’s flatbread creations masquerade as pizza while delivering none of the satisfaction. The crust manages to be simultaneously cracker-dry at the edges and oddly soggy in the middle – a textural contradiction that boggles the mind.
The toppings slide off with each bite, creating an awkward eat-with-fork situation nobody wants from hand food. For roughly the same price, we could get an actual pizza from a dedicated pizzeria that doesn’t leave us questioning our life choices.
3. Bacon Turkey Bravo Sandwich
The name screams ‘flavor explosion’ but delivers more of a polite flavor whisper. What should be a knockout combination – turkey, bacon, smoked gouda – somehow becomes less than exciting in execution.
The signature tomato spread often overwhelms everything else, turning what should be a complex sandwich into a one-note tomato experience. The bacon quantity feels like someone accidentally dropped three tiny pieces while making something else.
4. Southwest Caesar Salad With Chicken
Caesar salad identity crisis alert! Panera’s southwestern spin on this classic falls flat faster than a soufflé in a slammed door. The corn and bean additions feel random rather than purposeful – like someone accidentally spilled the taco bar into the salad station.
The dressing manages to be both too tangy and too bland simultaneously. When a salad leaves you craving literally anything else on the menu, something has gone terribly wrong.
5. Frontal Green Smoothie
Green should mean refreshing, not punishment! This smoothie tastes like someone blended lawn clippings with a hint of fruit as an afterthought. The earthy, almost dirt-like undertones make you question if they accidentally included the roots along with the vegetables.
The consistency varies wildly between visits – sometimes thick enough to stand a straw in, other times watery and separated. For the same price as this grass-adjacent concoction, you could buy enough fruits and veggies to make vastly superior smoothies at home for days.
6. Mac & Cheese Bread Bowl
Carb-loading taken to unnecessary extremes! This menu monstrosity combines two perfectly good items – mac & cheese and sourdough bread – into a heavy, overwhelming mess that leaves you needing a nap before you’re even halfway through.
By the end, you’re left with a sad, cheese-soaked bread mush that’s impossible to eat with dignity. The calorie count alone (over 1,000) makes this a once-a-year indulgence at best, absolute regret at worst.
7. Cinnamon Crunch Bagel
Sugar shock in circular form! This isn’t breakfast – it’s dessert pretending to have nutritional value. The cinnamon-sugar coating creates a deceptively crunchy exterior that quickly dissolves into a sticky mess on fingers, faces, car seats, and everything within a five-foot radius.
One bagel packs a whopping 32 grams of sugar – that’s more than many candy bars! When a ‘breakfast item’ makes your teeth hurt and your pancreas send distress signals, it’s time to reconsider its place in the morning routine.
8. Creamy Tomato Soup
Ketchup’s sophisticated cousin makes an underwhelming appearance! Panera’s tomato soup tastes suspiciously like marinara sauce that’s been thinned out and had cream stirred in as an afterthought. The overwhelming acidity leaves a strange tingling sensation on your tongue that lingers uncomfortably.
The inconsistent temperature is another mystery – somehow simultaneously nuclear-hot and oddly lukewarm in different spots. When the best part of your soup experience is the bread bowl it comes in, something is fundamentally wrong with your soup.
9. Soba Noodle Broth Bowl With Chicken
Cultural confusion in a bowl! Panera’s attempt at Asian-inspired cuisine falls flatter than day-old seltzer. The broth lacks depth, tasting like someone dissolved a bouillon cube in hot water and called it a day.
The noodles inevitably arrive either undercooked and crunchy or overcooked and mushy – never that elusive perfect texture. The sparse chicken pieces play hide-and-seek among noodles that seem determined to tangle themselves into an impenetrable knot that defies both fork and spoon.
10. Chipotle Chicken Avocado Melt
False advertising in sandwich form! ‘Chipotle’ suggests a smoky kick, but this melt delivers heat with all the intensity of a birthday candle. The avocado – the star ingredient in the name – appears in quantities so small you’ll need forensic equipment to locate it.
The real kicker? When you check the nutrition facts and discover this underwhelming sandwich packs almost 1,000 calories – making it simultaneously disappointing to both taste buds and waistlines.
11. Everything Bagel
Seed explosion gone wrong! Panera’s interpretation of this bagel classic features an unbalanced spice profile that leaves garlic dominating everything else. The excess of seeds means half end up on your lap, in your car, or mysteriously appearing in pockets days later.
The texture often veers toward the rubbery side rather than achieving that perfect chewy-crisp bagel balance. Most puzzling is how they manage to make it simultaneously too salty in some bites and bland in others – a taste inconsistency that defies bagel physics.
12. Frozen Caramel Cold Brew
Coffee identity crisis in a cup! This frozen concoction can’t decide if it’s coffee or dessert, ultimately failing at both. The caramel syrup creates a cloying sweetness that completely obliterates any actual coffee flavor – you might as well be drinking melted ice cream with caffeine.
The consistency problems are legendary in our family – sometimes slushy, sometimes separated into icy and liquid layers that refuse to mix no matter how aggressively you stir. For the same price as this sugar headache, you could get a quality cold brew elsewhere and still have change left for a tip!